Ladies....would you date a man who was in a Trial Seperation?

I am up in the air about even dating right now. My wife wants a 6 month seperation and she already starting dating after a month. I am just confused as to how I should handle this. I want her to know I am still the man she married and that I could be with another woman but I choose to be with her. I feel like she is acting out right now to show me that she is just as able. We have been married for one year and we dated for a year and a half but we had been chasing each other back and forth for over ten years. So should I just start dating too or should I stick to my guns to show how badly I want this to work? I really believe if she wanted a seperation she would not be dating she would be alone. I have tons of questions about this situation just tell me the first things that comes to mind or what you think I shold hear. But for this forum...would you date a guy in a seperation or should I not tell the girl, at first, I am dating that I am in a seperation in case I might scare her off?

Ladies....would you date a man who was in a Trial Seperation?
I would not date a separated man. You would not be truly available and a waste of my time. You want your wife back. So work towards that instead of playing games and possibly getting a 3rd person involved for no reason. If you happen to still try to date anyways, you must tell that person that you are separated and not trying to get a divorce. They deserve to know what they are getting into. Good luck with your marriage.
Reply:I would say it's too risky and I'm surprised your wife is doing it. mentioning it probably would scare off a lot of girls (depends what they're after) but so would not being honest if they find out later, or you have to break up the realationship to get back with your wife.
Reply:i would be honest with the girl...or else yeh you might scare her off and you might offend her a little.





hope it works between you and your wife
Reply:If I were you I wouldn't hold my breath. If you are in a trial separation she isn't supposed to be dating someone else. That is not fair to you. I would begin dating right away and forget the "trial' part. It looks like it is off. She will only return to you if she finds out that the grass is not greener on the other side. Why would you want to accept used goods? Go for it man, and forget her.
Reply:she sounds like a verry selfish, confused woman, she wants to be married but she also wants to have relations with other men.


and you are putting right there for her..


i am sorry to say it, but grow a pair(balls) and tell her do you want to be married to me? no seperation no dating other men you are with me or you are not...., its you who is suffering not her, give her the ultamatum.. and see if she makes the right choice.. if she dosen't then get a divorce and move on...just accept that she was not the right woman for you and find a woman that deserves you.


no i would not date a guy who was in a seperation period because it sounds as though all she has to do is snap her fingers and you will come running like a little puppy dog, and ill bet my bottom dollar she would make a fuss as soon as you dated another woman.. as i said she is selfish and is having it all her own way and you are letting her.....
Reply:If you both start dating you're never gonna get back together, and u'll fall in love with someone else. Now if you want to be with ur wife and no other woman, show her and dnt date other men. If she asks why ur not dating tell her its because u love her and there's no point in dating if u already know who you wanna spend the rest of ur life with.





Personally I would not date someone in a trial seperation because I would never feel as if we were completly commited, and i wuld think of it was just somethng casual, a fling, no strings attached.





good luck


hope i helped.
Reply:nope!!! too much baggage, and if it were me, I wouold always wonder if he would be getting back together with his wife, considering it is only a trial. I would stay away. Nothing but trouble.
Reply:you said "I really believe if she wanted a seperation she would not be dating she would be alone"


...WUT? you got it all mixed up man! if she DID'NT really want a separation SHE would be alone and would not date. So since she is dating...i think she's looking for a replacement of you already. I personally wouldn't date a man in trial separation....but why lie about this? what's your agenda?
Reply:First of you said you've been married a year? and already the separation comes about. she wants it for 6 months. who ever heard of a time frame for separation. If she started to date only after one month of the separation she was likely to have been cheating on you before she came up with this idea of a six months separation. At such a early stage of marriage she can't be serious of you. She seems to have issues with her self. I don't know how old she is but it sounds like she can take all that comes with a marriage to only want to separate after only a year of marriage isn't right. makes no sense what so ever. and to date a month later tells me she has some issues about weather or not she should have gotten married if she was truely ready to be married. She must feel that aniexty of why did I. I been married for 8 years. and some times feel like a trail separation because all the weight of the marriage is thrown on to me. but i think about the years invested in it. but i have a ray of hope it will change soon. any ways if she really want just some time to think she wouldn't date some else to see if there is any better out after one yer of marriage she might have cheated on you and wants to do this trail 6 months to see if she has any feeling for this other guy. separation is not about finding some else to see if find some one better. people are always going to look better at first cause they are new. but after awhile all the same problems can happen with them. stress from a mortage stress from a job not having the money to do the thing you use to do because you took the step to be as one. she got married and is scares her now or she cheated on you and wants to make up a reason for this separation. I wouldn't date some one who is in separation. unless they are on the verge of divorce and no chance of rekindling the marriage. but separation shouldn't be like that. She must feel over welmed because she doesn't have the money freedom to buy what ever she wanted because it affects you also on what she spends. if thats the case she is immature and needs to learn what marriage mean try getting some marriage consoling to see if you can resolve her issues she has about being married and not having that spending freedom. if that is her problem that is but maybe the consoling will help figure out if thats her problem. or what her problem is. have you asked her why the separation? What in th world makes want it so early in the marriage? To me it is usually cause they cheated. to hide the fact they cheated they come up witht his 6 month trail separation. Figure out the real reason behind this so you figure out if you should try to fix it or let it go. I hate to say it but if she cheated on you she didn't have to guts to tell you so she came up witht his trail separation thing. I would just talk to her and find out don't ask her if she cheated. but just ask her why is she dated in the separation when it suppose to be a time to think not a time to date. there is some thing funny there i think.
Reply:well the seperation is not the reason that i won't date with u, is where u put ur heart now, if still with her, so why should i date with u if you didn't see in me, if u just using me, right??
Reply:yes id find you so intresting but like if you were a tv show i wouldnt let my heart get into anything cause girls fall easy and hard ;[
Reply:no. once the trial is over and they go back together.. what happens to me. can not take that chance. sorry. no
Reply:Sure...date but don't let your heart get involved just in case,
Reply:you should be straight up about the situation. Chances are you will not be getting back with your wife.
Reply:NO NO NO NO NO NO NO !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Reply:Right. Read your other question and this whole thing obviously weighs heavy on your mind.





The answer to the question is: Absolutely not!


It is utterly unfair to whomever you're dating because you're still married and you may go back to your spouse. It boils down to you using other people. What will you say to your potential date: Hey lady, I'm married and I love my wife and if she says so, I'll go back to her, but in the meantime, I'd love to sleep with you?.





Are you afraid to divorce unless you have someone else lined up? Are you trying to live up to your wife's level of infidelity? All that does is make you equally wrong! If she started taking crack, would you go out and take crack to level the playing field? Think about the logic (or rather lack of logic) of what you're considering doing here.





Instead of involving a whole lot of other people, do yourself a favor and call it quits and then go out and date. This may be difficult, but forget what your wife is doing. It's wrong, either way you look at it. Make a clean break and get on with your life. Everything else will only make matters more difficult.