Change the date?

We've had our Caribbean destination wedding date set for 14 months now for July of this year and told all of our family %26amp; friends. Our initial wedding date was for August but fiance's family said they couldn't do it then so we changed it to accomodate them. July is not far off and we have just learned that one of fiance's brothers took off his vacation time for our wedding in September, not July. Fiance now wants to change our entire wedding date again and is calling me selfish because I don't want to do this. All of our family/friends have already taken time off for this date %26amp; it seems silly to change this again, for one person. Everyone can go except one person. It hurts me that he is calling me selfish after we already changed the date ONCE before. What do I do???

Change the date?
The needs of the many outweigh the needs of few. Keep the date the way it is - the more times you change it, the greater the chance you're going to upset even more people.





If your fiance's brother really wants to come, he'll change his own date.
Reply:well i certainly wouldnt change it again. every1 else has got time off for then. it is his fault that he got time off for september and not july. besides the other people may not be able to get time off for the other date. this does not mean that u r selfish u r just trying to think off evry1 else. i hope the wedding goes ok. good luck.
Reply:its a hrad situation and i understand why your man wants to change thet date because he wants his brother there, but you have changed it before and people changed their dates for you then, don't change it again you will really annoy people and also you may find some of them may not be able to go now. So if you change it for one person you rick a lot more people not being able to come. I think your man should understand this and stop taking it out on you, after all this is hardly your fault is it?
Reply:Does your fiance agrree with you?


I dont think you should change it again, i think you were good enough to change it the first time.


Was he told of the change to the date and forgot or something? If so, then it's his fault and not yours. If you didn't tell him, then this is a bit bad, but he should try and change the dates of his holidays, after all it is still 4 months away.
Reply:Its your wedding, why should you change the date just for one person?? I would stick with your plans as its too late now to start re-planning.





Tell your fiance that you have already changed the date to accomodate his family
Reply:If everyone else but your FBIL has already requested the time off, then, don't change it. It's too much to ask of everyone to change their schedules for one person.





Good luck, and Congratulations!!!!!
Reply:this is not your mistake and july is very close.


explain to your fiance that this is your special day and he os marrying you not his brother and if his brother made a mistake then there is nothing you can do. has his brother suggested that the date is changed?
Reply:I think if I was in your position, I would agree with you. Almost everyone got the correct date and reserved their time off. I think it would be selfish to decide that you wanted it in two weeks and told everyone, or that you actually wanted it in May, not July and told everyone. But that's a different story.


I think it would be easier for his one brother (that made a mistake) to speak with his supervisors/boss about switching the vacation time, rather than having all of the rest of the family do it to accommodate him (which, is your wedding, so people should be accommodating you!)


Don't be angry with your fiance (if you can help it) and try to talk it through calmly with him. If there are more reasons for him wanting to be married in September, than listen to them.





Good luck!
Reply:Call it off. Your finace thinks more of his brother than he does you. Not a great way to start a life together.
Reply:point out to him that he will be inconviencing a whole lot more people by changing the date a second time. Also you will lose deposits and a lot of money by changing the dates this late.





this whole thing sounds a bit fishy.





Is this an honest mistake on the brother's part? Or does this brother have a habit of game playing? He could speak to his employer and change his vacation a lot easier than you can change the wedding date.





Or is there something else going on here? Your fiance calling you selfish and throwing a fit over this seems like it is just an excuse. Find out if he will call off the wedding if you won't move the date--If he would then you have other issues with your fiance that you need to settle before you marry him.





Good Luck.
Reply:No
Reply:He is very much in the wrong to call you selfish. I can't imagine what job his brother has that he can not reschedule a vacation with so much notice. It's his fault for taking off the wrong days and the rest of the group going should not be punished for it. I would calmly explain to your fiance that everyone else has made accommodations and his brother made a mistake and needs to try and fix it. If he's still being a jerk then tell him your sorry he feels that way then go out with a couple friends that night and leave him home alone to be a jerk by himself.
Reply:you can't keep changing the date, the person who's going to marry you might have other weddings to do, you've alreadly altered it once, your fiance brother's not worth the hassle, he should of respected you because you already changed once before and then there telling you to alter it, just say your having the wedding as planned if he shows up he does, and if he doesn't then he's not worth the hassle and he's not much of brother to your fiance. keep the set date,.